I can’t bring my mind to think it, my lips to say it, my heart to admit it.
I am jealous of her.
She is beautiful and smart and together, and most days I feel inadequate…lacking…unkempt.
But envy doesn’t become me, and I know this: so for today I will deny the feelings, pull up the megaphone and try to cheer her on.
It is the truth, friends: sometimes, we all get jealous. It starts early, before we even have words to know what the feeling means.
As much as we want to be happy for the one who seems to have everything or get it, it’s a struggle; for there is a greater desire within to hear our name called, catch the eye and get the attention.
We are capable of cheering loud for others, but it is in our nature to cheer loudest for ourselves.
Sometimes, in our effort to move past our jealous feelings we decide things about her that we think will help: that we wouldn’t make good friends, that she is cold and has secret, shocking flaws that disqualify her from perfection. Our jealousy judges her, unfairly.
We call it shiny words like discernment and determine to wear our own success differently, should we achieve it.
But all the while, it is our soul that needs the tending.
When we let our jealous feelings run amuck, we jeopardize our own potential. We can’t live fully when we invest our time and energy in being jealous of her.
It is then…these things, we most need to remember:
- Jealousy never produces good in us. It severs, stifles, and kills spirits, starting with ours.
- Envy is not really about someone else. At the core, it is about us not being grateful or content with our own life.
- Our heart will only become more damaged by pretending our jealousy doesn’t exist. We must call it what it is to help it heal.
- Jealous feelings often feel out of control. But there are things we can do, today: focus on our own character building, put our head down and pray, continuously.
- When we serve, we expand our love. We defy our jealous feelings by serving the person we envy, and we watch how our love for them grows.
We come together as girls when we start by telling the truth about our struggle with comparison and our honest feelings of envy.
We honor the heart of the Father when we celebrate His good work in another.
We cheer each other on best when we first learn to celebrate the beautiful life in our mirror.
